Aet Lindling

Alright, this is not something I would read. Not enough paragraphs, and it's obvious you didn't even care enough about it to read it through and fix mistakes. Obviously you ...

Your imagery is the best feature of this poem, though that's not to say that the other parts aren't excellent as well. A way you could make your poetry better, ...

This whole poem operates under the conclusion that you will still care when you're an adult. Since you won't, and it's a delusion, the thing falls apart. This is the ...

This has a solid beginning, middle, and end. You use clever wording. It's probably because I'm tired and you've already edited it from others' suggestions (which gives you bonus points ...

The repetition at the beginning is good, actually, it leads up to something nicely, but only when it's leading up to something. Like people before me have said, this poem ...

This would be much better if you didn't force rhymes. Seems like a sweet poem and all, but it's all so awfully stilted and odd because you've tried to force ...

This is touching, written from real-life I'm guessing. Like others have said, the flow is a little jolted in places, but other than that the composition is pretty great. One ...

It becomes rather generic around the middle, which is a disappointment as it has the potential to become a light-hearted Dickinson-style word romp about the darkness inside mankind. It is ...

I hate everything you do I hate everything you say And from first sight you knew That every day You'd watch my every movement You'd watch whatever I did And ...

This has a progression of plot throughout the poem, which is rare among much of the poems in Dramatic Poetry. Starts out emo and ends optimistic. Congrats. Despite this, it ...

The colons detract from the poem as a whole, I would suggest taking them out. "But i just don't think so !" That's not very good. You don't capitalize "I", ...

You start out with a standard rhyme scheme of ABAB and then only one stanza later switch to a -A-A rhyming scheme, and then no rhyming for the third stanza, ...

Yes, yes it does, Galerius. Obviously. (Since other people have commented on the literary value of this poem, and I haven't done a nitpick in a while, I'll just nitpick ...

Decide whether or not you want this to rhyme. It rhymes in places and doesn't in others. I like the (not dear to me) repetition, it hints at something that ...

Doesn't explain enough. It leaves too much to the imagination, in a bad way. You say that someone left you, and you got all sad, and so on, and then ...